Makin' It Up As I Go Along

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3.7 The One About Old Ways of Being

When old ways of being die, it can be a bitch.

Sometimes, we make conscious decisions about these things:  we change our diet or vow to work out more.  We make plans, contact buddies and whip up a timeline on the calendar.

Sometimes something is done for us.

By someone, or circumstance, or passing moment.

And what a slap in the face that can be.

Especially when it was a way you didn’t realize you had.

You’re just used to it, you acquired it somewhere along the line of your life.

And then you’re aware that you now have a choice: continue on as is or make the change/s.

And nothing can be more irritating than knowing full well that you can’t just ‘continue on’.  You can’t go back to blissful pseudo ignorance, because now you know. So change it is.  What a pain in the ass.

And there’s a whole other layer of digging through your psyche, your soul, your childhood, your purse, looking at who you are and what you want or what you thought you wanted.  You come to realize that some of your instincts were learned incorrectly.  And there can be a mourning process.  You’ve known that part of you for so long.

It’s difficult.  It’s challenging, it’s outside your comfort zone, it can leave you confused.

But you also feel lighter, more focused, settled and flexible.  Excited about life.   The door was opened a crack, and looking inside, the world of possibility stretches before you once again.

Here we go. :)

 

September 6, 2011 - Posted by | Uncategorized

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